First time teaching jitters

A month ago was my first substituting job. No, I haven't switched positions, I am still a staff assistant but my boss wanted me to substitute for one of the 2nd grade classes for a few hours.
I was so nervous about teaching kids as a whole class solo. I actually didn't sleep much the night before. I knew we had a morning assembly so I was going to be able slowly adjust myself into being the teacher.
So the next morning I went to work and went right into the classroom and grabbed the kids and went to the assembly. The assembly was so fun and the kids learned a lot and actually had a great time.
After the assembly we went back to the room and started on the math lesson which was on counting coins. It was a lot of fun teaching them what a half dollar was. Most of the kids already knew what to do when they got the assignment so they were done within 15 minutes, while I helped other kids.
Then we worked on English and on Adjectives. To be honest I have never liked English and it still doesn't make that much sense to me so I am glad they knew what to do already.
After that we had about an hour left so I had them think about what they learned in the assembly and I picked a few kids to tell me what they had learned. It was so much fun inspiring them, boosting them up, and telling them that they can do whatever they set their minds to. It also helped that dad and Tia (one of my coworkers I've known since I was in elementary school, she's like an aunt to me, so I call her Tia) stood outside of the classroom and cheered me on.
I have definitely have found what I want to do for the rest of my life and couldn't be happier!!

Super Heroes Get Sick, Too.

Today the sun was shining, the leaves were back on the trees... today was going to be a wonderful day.

Or so I thought... I had just walked into Bonneville when a coworker told me that one of my adorable little first graders (who happens to also have Aspergers like me)  was just diagnosed with leukemia.

I went totally numb when I heard that. I just couldn't believe that it was happening to my little K (that is my nickname for him).

I went through the rest of the day kind of in a daze until it finally hit me when I was sitting with my first graders when their teacher told them the news.
After they received the news they were worried about him and said that we needed to make get well cards for him.
We all made cards for him, and we all miss having him in our class!

Little K has been that inspiration for me to continue pursuing teaching, and now he is our class super hero.

Super heroes get sick, too. And that makes their teachers feel helpless.

The adventures at the eye doctor.

A couple of weeks ago I had my first eye exam in 5 years. I wasn't able to see my usual eye doctor but their assistant said this other doctor was just as good. So I walk in the eye exam room with my dad, and we do the regular eye exam. When he was having me pick between 1 or 2 which one was more clear I kept saying "show me again" which he didn't like too much because he said it would give an inaccurate result.
I'm the kind of girl who wants to be 100% sure on everything that I do, so it was hard for me to go on my instinct. In the end, I was able to manage it, but but it wasn't easy!
After that test we did another test where one eye lense was red and the other one was green, and I was suppose to tell him which side looked more clear. But not to judge it on the colors.
After all was said and done, he said my vision was still good and that my vision hadn't really changed since the last time I had been there. He recommended that I get glasses to help me with seeing at a distance, which will help me see the board if I am in the back of a classroom.
I have had my glasses for a couple of weeks now and I absolutely love them. They are my style and I think I look younger with them - my family does too!

  

 

Christmas Day Crunch

This year for Christmas we spent the Eve with mom and did our family tradition (which is to get chinese food) and then after we tucked her in bed we headed up to my Grandparents house.
First of all can I just say that I love spending time out in the country where my grandparents live! I feel no stress, open land, not many people to bother you, it is just peaceful! We arrived there, went to bed and woke up the next morning (Christmas Morning!). Grandpa made his famous omelettes, we talked, ate breakfast and finally it was time to open presents! We opened them and I absolutely loved them (my grandma defintely knows what to buy for me, with me, you get clothes and books you are good to go)! We were able to spend time with the family before we had to head to Salt Lake City to the Airport to pick up Holly's best friend, Violet. We had a delicious family lunch with (almost) everybody, and we packed up and started heading home to drop off our luggage and gifts. Long story short, Holly got the hiccups so we stopped at 7 eleven for water. We got back on the road, and we were just coming up on the intersection at Skyline and I-89 when this car turned left in front of us and cut us off. Holly was driving,  and there was nothing she could do except slam on the brakes and try to miss them. She did really well, we didn't T-bone them, but we still clipped their back bumper. We stayed in the lane for a second to catch our breaths and realized we we ended up in the middle of the turn lane!!! We knew we had to get out of there fast, so we slowly pulled the car to the shoulder of the road and you could hear that the tire wasn't quite right, plastic was dragging on the pavement.
Holly put the car in park and we made sure none of us were hurt. Holly and I got out of the car to look at the damage and then dad tried getting out of the car and couldn't. Some of the metal from the fender had crunched into the passenger side door, preventing it from opening. That is when I started freaking out. A few not-so-nice words may or may not have slipped my lips...
Finally after a couple of minutes the couple from the other car came over to see how we were all doing. They seemed quite nice and very sorry for what had happened. Still didn't make me feel better since this had ruined our whole day's plans (and that is usually when I have my "meltdowns") and we were now without a car. When the police arrived, they came over and assessed the damage, and we told them our car wasn't driveable and that we needed to call someone for a ride home. Dad was finally able to get in touch with a family friend and he came and picked us up and took us home.
Am I mad that our car was wrecked? Of course!!! Am I mad that our Christmas schedule was runied? yep. Am I glad that both parties from this accident were fine and that no one had any injuries? Absolutely.
In someways it's a bummer, in other ways it was our Christmas Miracle.

Yes, I have Aspergers. No, I am not a killer.

Last Friday the 14th, will be a day that will always stick out in my mind. Not only did it open my eyes to the lack of security measures in the school I work at, but the nation is thinking the same way. It was the the day that 26 innocent lives, mostly children were taken away by a obviously disturbed young man.

Why am I writing about this? Well, a couple of hours after the tragedy made National News, we were finally finding out somethings about the killer.

The first 2 things I remember hearing about the killer was that he was labeled a "genius" and, that he could never make eye contact. And that's when I guessed he had the same disorder as me, Aspergers. What I didn't know was how certain people and the media were going to portray people with Aspergers. Within 8 hours of the tragedy it was all over my twitter feed, assuming that people with Aspergers could all become serial killers.

Excuse me?!?!? Me becoming a killer?
I have smacked my sister before and even then I feel bad about it. I don't know how someone could kill 26 people especially children.
I have been working at my elementary school for 4 years now and as a paid staff for 10 months. I would be one of the people protecting my "kids" students instead of hurting them.

The hardest day since the tragedy was Monday, December 17th. Why you might ask? Because when I left work on Friday we knew nothing about the shooter. Well, most of my coworkers know that I have Aspergers and I didn't want them to be scared of me or around me. I also had no idea how my extended family would come to terms with everything that was going on and that they shouldn't be worried around me. But, at the end of the day I was still treated the same way and I was relieved.


Having Aspergers doesn't make me a murderer- it makes me an everyday Aspie.

Took a single pink rose to the Christmas Box Angel Statue for all 20 children that died last week, including a girl that was born here in Ogden.

All of the surrounding area got together and put pink ribbons up everywhere in support for little Emilie who was from Ogden.

I left work the other day and saw this sign outside of the school I work at. It brought tears to my eyes because I do love my kids, and I would do anything in my power to protect them.  

Bucket List #37

On Friday there were a whole range of emotions flowing in me. But, I don't want to bore you with the details, so let me tell you about the high points. Every year the Mormon Tabernacle Choir puts on a Christmas Concert, and this year I wanted to go so badly for one reason: Tom Brokaw. If you don't know who he is, he is a national news anchor, who I just happen to share a birthday with! 10x more exciting.

Well, we made our way down there hoping we would be able to get into the Conference Center to see the performance in person. We weren't able to get in, so we went to the tabernacle to watch via satellite, which (thank goodness) worked out to our benefit since we knew Tom would be at Deseret Book immediately after the concert signing books. So, we rushed through Temple Square and across the street to Deseret Book.

The lines were already forming so we had to hurry and get in line behind some middle aged women who were acting like tween fangirls wanting the performing artist Alfie Boe to sign their CD's... Disgusting. Directly behind us was this 20-something year-old guy who thought he was Gods gift to women. And everyone else. Ugh.

For once in my life, I wasn't the impatient one. Holly was. granted, she was hungry, tired, and extremely annoyed. (I was too, I just seem to conceal it better when annoyed.)

Fast forward an hour and a half and we were finally next in line... and I started to get nervous. When it was finally my turn, Holly actually had to give me a nudge so I would hand my book over to Tom's assistant so he could sign it. The one time I am quiet in my life is the same time I wanted to tell him that I admire him so much. But instead I had a huge smile on my face and only said thank you when he smiled back at me. When I looked at my book and back at him I was floating on cloud 9! I had just met one of my idols!

...and that was the time this aspie was made extremely happy. :)

Bucket List #37 ? Check!

12/2/2012

Last Tuesday I went to see my counselor at Vocational Rehab (or VR) to see what the next step would be to get me back to college.

The first thing we looked at was the results of my career aptitude test. And, to no suprise, my math and spelling scores were above average and also to no suprise my english scores were a bit below average (too many rules and exceptions to memorize!). The next thing we looked at was my interests, and the things that I might enjoy doing.

What I found interesting, was that in my results from my aptitude test, among my top interests (just after teaching), was farming. I come from a long line of farmers on both sides, but particularly my great grandfather on my dad's side, Leyan Nelson, whose birthday I share. I have always felt so close to him even though I have never met him, and this just summed up how much we have in common.

After we discovered this little tid-bit of information, my counselors supervisor came in, and I was so nervous around him I would look to dad for answers.

They told me I would have to meet with a therapist (for my social anxiety, and to learn how to cope with certain situations). Also need to see my doctor so we can get my ADD under control (if you personally know me, you can totally tell because i will be totally focused and then I will hear a sound and my focus is gone.)

So, before I can start school they want me to be "stable" so I can focus and have a somewhat normal college experience. Makes sense, wouldn't want to be unstable in an already unstable place! :)

* I want to thank my little sister Holly, for all she does to help me edit my posts so it actually makes sense to you all. :)